complaining – do we even have a right?

I can’t count the number of times I’ve heard, “I hate this food!” or “My boyfriend broke up with me! My world is ending!” or “I’m STARVING!”

We don’t even think about what we’re saying. Complaining comes so naturally in our culture, we don’t even REALIZE what we’re saying.

But seriously, people. We live in an amazing country, if you’re reading this you have access to a computer and the internet, we’re alive, most of us have friends and family and money.

But your life is TERRIBLE if you’re the tiniest bit cold, or if you’re slightly overweight, or if, god forbid, your girlfriend or boyfriend of five months broke it off.

I was depressed for a year+. Most of it, I can tell you now, was a relentless pity party because my friends didn’t like me enough or I didn’t get straight A’s.

Now, the initial cause of the depression was legit. I was terrified I was going to seriously hurt someone physically (it was an OCD thing).

But it turned into, “Oh my gosh, he called me ugly, I’m gonna cut myself and then he’ll be sorry.”

After causing my parents no end of grief, and costing them almost no end of money, I finally snapped out of it. Maybe it was the meds, idk.

But the moral of the story is, I got sucked into the American belief of entitlement. Everyone else should make me happy. I deserve this dress. I deserve those shoes. I NEED a new phone.

Now that I think about it, it’s INSANE. I had everything I needed, and almost everything for which I had even a passing desire, but no. I didn’t have enough friends. I didn’t have a boyfriend. I wanted THIS person to go out with me. No, not THAT one. That one isn’t good enough for me.

Why do we feel like this? Maybe it’s the media, telling us we can’t be happy without a relationship and expensive shoes and better food. Maybe it’s just a human tendency to want more, more, more.

Now, I’m not talking about being upset that your father is a soldier, or your grandmother has cancer, or your mother died. That’s not complaining. That’s a legitimate emotion.

But the idea that we have a terrible life, or that we deserve better, or that it’s another person’s (or a god’s, or the government’s, or the world’s) responsibility to make YOU happy – those are ridiculous concepts.

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2 thoughts on “complaining – do we even have a right?

  1. Mike Fook December 8, 2010 / 7:40 PM

    I love when you write Hannah! (Uncle Vern)

  2. Mike Fook December 8, 2010 / 7:47 PM

    Some of the greatest advice I’ve ever heard – and it came from multiple people over the years…

    “Take care of yourself. There is nobody on the planet that is looking after you – like you are. There is nobody else that is more concerned with you than they are with themselves.”

    Make yourself happy. You are the only one responsible for your own happiness. Not your parents, siblings, friends, teachers, or your religion.

    There are people outside you that will bring you down – the same list of people mentioned in the previous paragraph. You must realize when someone is bringing you down – and escape their tentacles.

    Someone that is not very strong in their happiness cannot help others that are not either. There is a strong risk they themselves will be sucked down into the vortex (toilet bowl) of unhappiness along with their friend.

    1. Make yourself happy. Heal yourself. Take care of yourself. Create a life for yourself that is the ultimate happiness for you – not based on what media is telling you.

    2. Help others do the same when you’re strong enough to do so.

    Life can be a wretched game… better to make yourself a winner – at any cost.

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